A Re-Discovery

In the name of God, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Notation: This post is written in hindsight. If at all I miss-collect from memory or if you for any reason take offense in the article, I'd like to apologize first and foremost. All shortcomings come from me and all that is good and true comes from Him.


So, kalau nak dibuatkan cerita, in early March 2010 I had resigned from my position of Country Manager of a major German multinational corporation.

Why did I decided to leave? since I had a huge income, a nice condo, a BMW and a Porsche as a weekend car. A few amongst the many reasons are;

• Like many who had made it to the top of the corporate ladder after struggling in the rat-race for so many years, I was disillusioned and had lost myself
• My sins up until that point of time weighted heavily on my soul
• I had lost faith in material wealth and was determined to find answers, to find God again
• I wanted a simpler life that was less demanding on my time and I didn't mind if it meant being poorer

On the first point, I had once been on a diving trip to a small island on the East Coast where I met the resort owner. The resort was new and the owner had just realized his dream of living on an island, by giving up his career as a senior manager of another multi-national corporation. I thought about him when I was weighing on my decision to leave the corporate world, and I had remembered that I felt envious that he was finally "free" and at peace with God.

I shall not elaborate on the other reasons because the point I'm trying to make is that when I finally went to work for myself, I had met an acquaintance in the course of things. He was an upright, trustworthy and principled businessman. More importantly, he was a pious man who spent as little time as possible on worldly affairs to attend to his responsibility as a servant of God. This Tuan Haji, now a Dato', was always ready to offer a smile, humble, greeted everyone politely and had a cheerful disposition. AND, he was always talking about God and/or religion whenever he had the chance.

Yes, he was a Muslim. Over time, I found myself asking questions about Islam after our meetings and in due course I had embarked on a fact-finding mission to learn about the religion this man had made so made an impression of.

Living in Malaysia where the majority of the populace is Muslim, I have had many Malay-Muslim friends since I was little. Some were good examples of a Muslim, while others were so-so, and a minority were not so. But none had talked about the beauty of Islam so consistently and since he is a learned man on matters of comparative religion, he also spoke a fair bit on the differences of the major religions.

One day in November 2010, while sitting in his office, he was telling me and a few business associates about his acquaintance, practicing law, who was a Roman Catholic before being a Muslim. After the meeting, I asked to speak privately with Dato' and asked if I could speak to the lawyer in question because I wanted to meet him and ask to him about his experiences. I wanted to understand why he felt convinced that Islam was the answer in his life and is the true path to God.

Alas as fate would have it, I did not get to meet this gentleman. But Dato' and a mutual dear friend of ours had arranged for me to meet someone else instead. That someone was Dr. Ir. Fuad Yeoh Abdullah.We met one fine day and spent almost the whole day talking. We debated. This went on for hours and then finally I found it! Found what?

You see, as a Roman Catholic, was is most dear that is ingrained in us are God, Jesus Christ (peace be upon him) and Mother Mary (peace be upon her). In Islam, they believe that God so loved Christ his Prophet and Messenger that He raised Christ to save him from mortal pain and death. Christ did not suffer, did not die a mortal death and by the Grace of God was raised to heaven! Islam also proclaims the Immaculate Conception of Jesus (peace be upon him)!

In Islam, it further reinforces to us that Christ is the Messiah! there would be a Second coming, Christ (peace be upon him) will battle and defeat the Anti-Christ and will rule the world from Jerusalem. King of Kings, bowing to God's Will.

And if that was not enough, Mother Mary (peace be with her) is revered, respected and had an entire chapter in the Holy Quran for her. How great is that!?

We all heard of it before, for me some of it, I was happily surprised. So after my meeting with Dr. Fuad, I spent time verifying facts, read the Bible and the Quran, searched for materials, so on and so forth. And to answer the question earlier on what did I find? I found the good news that, in my humble and worthless opinion, all Christians should be happy to learn;

1. Jesus Christ (peace be upon him) did not die on the cross, he was raised to Him.
2. Jesus Christ (peace be upon him) is the Messiah.
3. That we can pray directly to God, without intercessors or intersessions.
4. That we confesses our sins to God, seek mercy, repentance and taubat directly from Him.
5. That Mother Mary (peace be upon her) is revered and placed in a high position, she was the chosen one because of her purity to conceive Christ (peace be upon him) through immaculate conception.
6. At the end of Days, there is only one Judge
7. That Islam is not a new religion nor was it borned from Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). Islam (meaning: peace and submission to the will of God) is and has been the only religion from the Prophets Adam (peace be upon him) to Muhammad (peace be upon him)
8. There has been over a hundred thousand prophets throughout human existence, 313 messengers, of which 25 are well known to us as and 5 are placed most highly because they suffered the most. In order of historical timeline, they are;
• Noah (peace be upon him)
• Abraham (peace be upon him)
• Moses (peace be upon him)
• Jesus (peace be upon him)
• Muhammad (peace be upon him)
9. That Muhammad's lineage was from Abraham (peace be upon him)
10. That God had, after the Injil (Gospel) was adulterated by human hands, sent down the final book through the last of the chosen ones, Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). God had promised to keep the last book (Holy Quran) pure from altercation and adulteration.
11. Islam makes it an article of faith to believe in the unadulterated;
• Torah given to Moses (peace be upon him)
• Psalms given to David (peace be upon him)
• Gospel given to Jesus (peace be upon him)
• Quran given to Muhammad (peace be upon him)
12. And since the Holy Quran is the only book surviving and unadulterated in its original form since it was sent down, Muslims, sadly, has only one Holy book of God.
13. The wordings of the Quran has never been changed, edited, added or subtracted throughout history  
14. That the Old Testament still is a source of academic reference in Islam, especially with regards to historical timelines, events.  

The list above and below is by no way exhaustive, but me being human, have to perform the beautiful prayer shortly so please excuse my lack of time.

Other facts of interest, if you care to investigate yourself;

1. Jesus (peace be upon him) never claimed Divinity
2. Muslims being of Islam, prays as Abraham, Moses and Jesus (peace be upon them) had prayed to God, the One and Only, Most Gracious, Most Merciful 
3. We are all Muslims, our submission is to God Almighty. The Creator, not the created.
4. The Gospel of Barnabas & The Dead Sea Scrolls

And so, I had Re-Discovered my faith.
I submitted my will to Allah swt on the 12th of Nov 2010, Alhamduillah, praise be to God.
And my journey begins.
As I end this post, I leave you with these words from the Holy Quran;

A'uzu billahi minashaitanir rajim
In the name of God, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Say (proclaim): "He is God, the One!"
Allah, the Eternal, Absolute
He begetteth not nor was He begotten
There is none like unto Him (112:1-4)

The More I Know, The Less I Know

When I was born, the "Agama" column on my birth certificate stated my religion as "Buddha". Therefore I guess my religion of birth was Buddhist. Throughout my early childhood, I couldn't remember being taught any Buddhist teachings. Values perhaps, not teachings.

I had very little understanding of the concept of religion and the concept of God at this stage, let alone articles of faith. Nor I guess, was I very interested in the subject matter, as I was following as I was taught. When I was seven, my parents sent me to a Chinese-medium school kindergarten in town next to the town church and on the very first day of kindy I came back crying and protesting, insisting not to be sent back to there. My pleas must've made a impact, for the next day, I was enrolled into the Convent's kindergarten. Thus my parent's hope that at least one of their children be Chinese-educated was crushed. All my siblings, myself included was therefore English-educated (BM was not the mandatory medium of teaching then).

I guess it was since then that my mother brought me to attend masses and Sunday School at the local church, St. Anne's. Although I can't remember the specifics, but kindergarten in the Convent was alot of fun, so was Sunday mass and Sunday school in church. My mother had been born a Roman Catholic and had always been God-fearing. I guess she wanted her children to be saved spiritually and insisted to my Buddhist father that us siblings attended church.

And that served as the basis of my religious upbringing. Although I attended church regularly, prayed and celebrated all the Christian festivities, I was never baptized and had never received the Holy Communion. While throughout all these, at home, our family still practiced traditional Chinese customs and worshiping of our ancestors. So therefore, I guess you could say I was brought up as a Buddhist, Taoist and Catholic.

As I grew older, finished school, left home for college and subsequently joined the workforce, religion played a very small role in my late teens and early 20's. I guess I wasn't going to let youth be wasted on the young. So my attendance to Sunday mass kept dropping until I virtually stopped going to church, except for Christmas eve and day.

Naturally in a melting-pot of a country like ours, we learn early on the customs and religion of those around us. But, it was at this stage in my life that I became more aware of the concept of religion, and developed an interest in the different religions being practiced in Malaysia. In the early days of the world wide web, very little resource are available online, so you had to either ask an actual person or read a book. I did alot of both.

At the age of 24, I met my wife (now ex) and I wanted to give my mother her wish that my wife and I be married in a church as Christians, so we enrolled for catechism of the catholic church at St. Ignatius. The catechism covered the 4 pillars of the catholic faith;

The profession of  Faith
The sacraments of Faith; or Christian mystery
The life of Faith; or Life in Christ
Prayer in the life of Faith; or The Christian Prayer

Both of us were eventually baptized and confirmed in 2001, we took the christian marriage course and were married the following year in the historic and beautiful St. Anne's church, where it all began for me - I returned to St. Anne as a Christian. (note on the wedding: It was a beautiful service on a beautiful day in the most picturesque church.)

And throughout the years, although my faith in Christ remained in my heart, my faith in the church waned. And as it were, one day, the questions started to pile on. And as I took on myself to search for answers and searching for God; the more I knew, the less I knew.

In the end, the best I could answer myself was that there is only One God; an energy or a matter that is omnipresent and omnipotent.